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Grapevine : January 2011
Ready to confess? An alcoholic goes into the confessional box a er years of being away from the church. ere's a fully equipped bar with Irish stout on tap. On the other wall is a daz- zling array of the finest cigars and chocolates. en the priest comes in. "Father, forgive me, for it's been a very long time since I've been to confes- sion, but I must first admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be." e priest replies: "Get out. You're on my side." Bob M. Green Valley, Ariz Someone was listening A man called the AA phone just before meeting time and said, "I don't go to meetings anymore, but I want to talk to that man who said he would buy you a bottle if you want to get drunk." John B. Athens, Texas Heard at meetings Confidence is that feeling you have just before you do Step Four. Terry B., Albany, N.Y. "I've been sober as long as I can remember!" Danny C. Colfax, Calif. Oldie but goodie A badly hungover husband sat at the breakfast table, his eyes half shut and his tongue feeling as though he had been licking a dusty rug. Moodily toying with his food, he complained, " ese eggs taste funny." "Of course your eggs taste funny," snapped his spouse. " ey're pancakes." At Wit's End "Are you meditating or are you drunk again?" Grapevine 59