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Grapevine : February 2011
OF SPANDEX AND SPIRITUALITY He finally accepted his alcoholism, his sexuality and his life IN May 1996, when I first came to Alcoholics Anonymous, I heard people say that they were alco- holics waiting to happen. That was me, too. I had never felt comfortable in my own skin. I thought it was because I was the baby of my family and never got the respect I thought I deserved, or per- haps it was because I was attracted to the "wrong" sex, or because of all the issues I had with my parents. But those are things that I could've taken care of with counseling. What I couldn't get outside help with was that fact that I was born and will die an alcoholic. Alcohol got me through my late teens and allowed me to fit in at col- lege. And when I was in my late 20s, alcohol allowed me to talk to that totally hot guy at that party who I knew was my knight in shining armor. I would no longer have to wor- ry that I knew nothing about getting a promotion at work or making enough to buy the things I wanted. He told me he would take care of me and he did, sort of. Unfortunately, he drank and drugged the same way I did, and after being together for seven years, he was terminated from his well-paying job. I figured if he wasn't going to keep me in the fashion he had promised, there was no reason for me to stay in what was a dysfunctional relationship. I knew he still loved me, but my love for him had died years before. Being the good alcoholic I was, two weeks later I met another guy. SOBER AND OUT 14 February 2011