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Grapevine : April 2011
22 April 2011 WHEN my spon- sees and I take Step ree, we read from the top of page 64 in the Big Book. e para- graph states: " ough our decision was a vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent e ect unless at once followed by a strenuous e ort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us." For us, this is the inventory step. I tell each sponsee that I have unilaterally determined "at once" to be 48 hours from taking Step ree. I then get a yellow, legal-sized pad of paper and draw three vertical lines creating four col- umns and make the fol- lowing headings from le to right at the top of the four columns: "Who Am I Mad At?" (the infamous resentment column), "Why?", "How is A ects Me," and "My Part." I ask him to think of all the anger he still feels from his past toward people, institutions (police, IRS), or principles ("honesty is the best policy"). I explain it's important to write down and never across. A er he's written on paper everything he still harbors anger over, I tell him to go to the column entitled "Why?" and write down a few words that were the cause for this feeling. His assignment is to complete these two columns in week one. When he comes back, I will not read what he has written nor will we discuss it, unless he has particular questions. I am a guide. He will do all "the heavy li ing." My duty is to help him find his truth. At our second meeting, I ask him to review the matrix on page 65 of the Big Book, paying close at- tention to the column enti- tled "A ects My." He can use these suggestions to help him identify how his resentments are a ecting his life. He can use other expressions, but these are helpful in completing the third column. e final column on the resentment inventory A Unilateral Approach When it comes to working Step Four, it's this sponsor's way or the freeway