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Grapevine : April 2011
give someone about to jump out of an airplane: It is suggested that they wear a parachute. I let her know I had completed the workbooks I had been given in treatment for Steps One through Four, I'd drawn a picture of my High- er Power and I had quite a stupen- dous relapse prevention program. She took a copy of the Big Book down from her shelf, opened to the very first page, which is blank. That's what I knew about living life sober, she told me---absolutely nothing. I was completely offended! I was an in- telligent high school graduate with a very high GPA (done mostly in black- outs, but still ...). Initially, I was under the impres- sion that the Big Book was archaic, patriarchal and grammatically incor- rect. I began correcting grammar, which included making God gender neutral. Once, when I was given the opportunity during a meeting to re- cite "How It Works" in this fashion, my sponsor interrupted my passion- ate interpretation by taking it from my hands and hitting me over the head with it, inquiring when was I go- ing to behave with respect for some- thing that gave me a life worth living? She saw me for what I was: 18, cocky and terrified. She opened the book to "There is a Solution," and I learned the defini- My parents were stuck in the '60s, and we stayed in several communes. aagrapevine.org 39